A contagion infects all of America’s latest full-size pickup trucks. What were once boring machines built for utility are now the most overstyled, oversize, and overwrought of vehicles. Look at the 2017 Nissan Titan. An entire steer could be barbecued on its grille, were that component not made out of easy-melt shiny plastic. The fenders are as tall and square-shouldered as a Cleveland Browns lineman. If any button were bigger on the instrument panel, it could be engaged with a sledgehammer. The heavy steering feels as if you’re pulling against a black hole’s gravity. Aliens couldn’t undermine humanity’s faith in our own self-restraint any more convincingly. Someday, all this will be regarded as an era of unbridled excess every bit as flamboyant as the big fins and shiny chrome of the 1950s—and probably with as much nostalgia.
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